[waves crashing against a shore]
[Denali] I overheard someone talking about their problems the other day.
"I had the worst day ever", they said.
"First, there was nowhere to park at Whole Foods,
and everyone was acting all aggro,
so I had to walk like two blocks in the rain, and my shoes got soaked.
Then my stupid salad was like $12.
Then I was in such a rush to get to yoga,
I forgot my mat
and I had to use some nasty loaner mat
and it smelled like balls."
[Denali] I don't know what the big deal is, I love the way balls smell.
I'm pretty sure Ben knows I'm dying.
I'm not sure if it's the cancer or something else,
but he's been taking me
to all the places we used to go to,
and checking on me a lot.
The other day he asked me to let him know
when I was ready to go.
He said he didn't want me to suffer.
[waves crashing]
Growing up with Ben was pretty great.
He made pictures for a living,
and didn't feel as comfortable in the city,
so we traveled around a lot.
He's what his hippie friends call
a "free spirit" or something.
We camped a lot.
I'd pretend I was a giant stinky butterfly.
I'd help Ben find girlfriends.
We'd go shark fishing.
We'd do yoga.
I'd give him kisses.
We'd hang out with famous people.
We even went sailing in the desert once.
Which brings me to a time in my life
that I've always been a little self-conscious about.
Of course it's not my fault,
but I became SO HANDSOME
that it was impossible to ignore.
When Ben started to notice,
I had to start working for a living.
Humiliating outfits became pretty standard.
If you've ever been told to look cute,
you know it's not as easy as it sounds.
And you can't just fake special kisses in the studio.
It won't look authentic.
Oh man, those were the good old days for sure.
I think most people would've left their old dog at home,
but Ben insisted on taking me to all our favourite spots one more time.
I think he feels like he can't leave my side right now.
This one time, about ten years ago,
we were camping at Joshua Tree,
and Ben stood up by the campfire and just passed out.
And he started bleeding.
Things changed a lot after that.
When I licked him, I could taste the chemicals
they were putting in him to kill the cancer;
but it just seemed like they were killing him too.
[muffled deep waves crashing under water]
If anyone had tried to take me out of that hospital room,
I would've bitten their face.
I remember feeling really sad for Ben
when he found out he'd have to poop into a plastic bag attached to his stomach
for the rest of his life.
Mainly because he already had to put all of my poop into plastic bags.
The worst though was when this letter came from the insurance company.
["...we are rescinding your coverage and denying the claim."]
One time I had the best dream ever.
I dreamed I had rabies
and snuck into the insurance company
to share my rabies with as many people as I could
before they shot me with a tranquilizer gun.
I don't know what I would have done without Ben.
I'm so glad his cancer went away.
I'd be so scared right now
if I was going through this without him.
I've been trying to be really strong for him this week.
Just like he was when things were going really bad.
My last night was really peaceful.
I wasn't hungry anymore,
so I let Ben know it was time.
And he let me sleep on his chest all night.
Ben said a raven swooped by
while he carried me to the vet's car in the morning.
I'm sure his hippie friends had lots to say about that.
There was this really smart scientist guy
who thought that people could learn a lot from dogs.
He said that when someone you love
walks through the door,
even if it happens five times a day,
you should go totally insane with joy.
[sweeping melodic electronic music with high vocals]